Even though it has been cold I no longer worry about the cost of heating. I watched the Government video where Grant Shapps has money saving tips. I laughed so hard it was sweating by the end of it.
Instead of using a professional production outfit it looks like Grant did it all on his own. Honestly, you stop MPs claiming things on expenses and they find interesting ways to earn that extra cash.
In one scene Mr Shapps turns off a light and saves even more money by not having any lights near the camera to film it well.
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In the old days we didn’t need someone telling us to turn things off, that’s what dads did. In the 1980s fathers would move round the house touching radiators and closing doors. If you opened the fridge to browse you’d receive a rant about how we’re not made of money.
Grant turns off his microwave oven and for some reason also pulls the plug out of the wall, in case he is worried that poltergeists are trying to run up his fuel bill.
Then we see a shot of his dog and for a second I thought he was going to eat it. These are severe cost-saving measures when the family pets are involved. Later we see his cat and then a draught excluder: I thought that was a before and after.
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Grant did interviews from his home and explained that having your boiler at around 60C instead of its maximum setting means it will still heat your rooms to the same temperature but it will do it more efficiently. He delivered this as if it was a hidden kernel of information so oblique that it would appear on QI. I looked at my boiler and right next to 60C it says “eco”.
The advice is good. Most you will already know and if you didn’t know it you could save some money. They have calculated that if you applied all of the tips from the Government you could save around £230 a year.
The annoying part is the biggest money-saving tip that was missed. If we hadn’t had that strange spell where we spooked the markets and saw the UK’s cost of borrowing go up we would be spending far less servicing our mortgage payments.
How was the Government to know about that though? No one had made them a handy video.
- Steve Allen is a broadcaster and comedian
